Wednesday, July 29, 2009

I am grateful

I am grateful today... I dont' know why today or what made me feel so grateful today because it hasn't been the best day really but I am grateful!

I am grateful that I get to stay home with my kids but that I get to be my own boss & have this fun business on the side! I am grateful EVERYDAY for this business. It has done SOOOOO much better than what I had dreamed! I just finished my first wholesale order (I am grateful for Sharni for that one!) & continue to have great success!

I am grateful for my kids, who constantly make me laugh. I am grateful for Lukas & his sweet little scruchy face! I am grateful for him being "normal" & easy going so that I can deal with Brok! I am grateful for the bond that we have even though sometimes I wish I had more free time to myself instead of you wanting to be held! I am grateful for the fact that you LOVE your brother! What great friends you will be! I am grateful for your little skinny chicken legs! I love you little! I am grateful for Brok- who never ever gives up! You have taught me way too much in the past 2 years! Wow... I am grateful for your special little spirit that you bring! I am so grateful that you are walking. Oh boy am I! & you are doing sooooo good! Recently we have started walking into/out of & around stores. It's awesome! I am so grateful that you are starting to copy us!!! YAY! I love you toad!

I am grateful for Kevin! I love how stupid we can be at night when we are both so tired that everything is funny! I am grateful for your hugs. I am grateful for your support & help with the boys while I work in my "cave". I am grateful that you spend 9hrs a day working at a job that maybe isnt what you dreamed of so tha we have the security of a paycheck! I love you Babe.

Life is good. I am just grateful! What a great great life I have!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The nerve of some people

This is going to be a vent of sorts- it's on my mind & I really have no where else to tell about it... I know it's something I need to get used to but really?

We were at the commissary today, Brok, Lukas & I- with our friends Tab & Bray- but they were further back in line. Brok's in the back of the cart happily playing making noise- very loudly- he does his little shrill laugh/scream/noise thing when he mad or happy because he doesnt know how to regulate just a little bit. I hear this lady behind me at the next register say "Some people need to learn some respect for others" So I turn right around & say Back to her (I know I just added fuel to her fire but really-) "He has autism (not sure yet but probably in some form) he doesn't know any better or how to control it" So she retorts back with something like "Needs to learn respect for others, this is disrespectful" So I tell her again "He has autism, he doesn't know any better" She says "So take him outside, it's disrespectful to others in the building" (mind you he isn't doing his mad scream, just a happy LOUD noise) "I turned right back around & said "What am I supposed to do? I am alone & I am in the middle of checking out? I am supposed to take him out now? RIght" To which she says "I have kids & I just take them outside" I said back (& I am sure you can gather the tone of my voice right now) "HE HAS AUTISM. HE CAN'T HELP IT. DO I NEED TO WEAR A LABEL THAT SAYS MY KID HAS A DISABILITY?" She just keeps repeating that she has kids & takes them out & how disrespectful it is that he is being so loud. So I turn around one more time & say "You need to learn some respect for kids with disabilities. He has autism, he doesn't understand"

Seriously could people be any more rude? Do you really know what my life is like? Do you know what my child does ALL day EVERYDAY? No because you had yourself a little normal child that understood when it was time to be quiet, or understands a smack on the mouth or gets it when you say "Be quiet" If you are so sure you would handle things differently, please take him home with you, do my job for a day & see what it's like. See how he sits there & screams while I am typing this for no reason other than he wants to scream. & I don't mean throw a fit scream, I mean scream bloody murder like someone is killing you.

Fast Forward to a few hours later. We go out with our friends to get their windows tinted & we decided to hang out at the pizza place in the shopping center. There were a total of maybe 5 people who came in & out while we were there & no one seemed to mind that brok was on the floor crawling & walking around. UNTIL... This lady walks in, sees Brok & the first thing she says is "Oh, HI" in the most disgusted & rude tone ever. She was in the restaurant with us for maybe 2min & the WHOLE time all she could say was "That poor child, look how filthy he is. Oh that mother, what is she thinking" Seriously- do you think my child would be wearing CLEAN clothes & that my other child would look so well put together but still be so filthy? I mean really? If you paid an ounce of attention to him, you would realize that it was from crawling on the floor- the backs of his legs were spotless & so was his arms.

Some people are so ignorant & I just don't know why. My mom says it was just his day today & that I need to pray that they will be enlightened to the reality of the world we live in, that not every child fits the mold of what they think "perfect" is. Or that they will remember the words of Thumper from Bambi "If ya can't say sumthin nice, don't say nothin at all"

It must have just been one of those things that I needed to go through but even still as I sit here typing this out, I am so furious that someone could be so rude. Didn't their moms teach them manners? I mean I get if you are going ot talk about my kid, yeah he can be annoying but don't say it where A) I can hear it & B) while I am standing there...

That's all- sorry to unleash my fury on you... Jsut one of those days...